Modesty is not a double standard. it applies to both men and women, boys and girls!

According to Brent Harris, co-author of “Do Hard Things”, he has received several emails from frustrated girls. They say that Christian guys expect girls to be modest, but hardly give a second though to their own modesty.

Why are we only talking about female modesty? If modesty is important then it is important for all Christians. If it isn’t important for men, then why all the fuss about women? If it is important for women, why the silence about men?

Is it because guys can’t be immodest? Nope. I’m pretty sure the existence of speedos rules out that possibility.

Is it because girls don’t struggle with physical lust? Nope. Pretty sure Potiphar’s wife wasn’t the last woman to “cast her eyes” on a guy and lust after his “handsome form and appearance” (Gen. 39:6-7).

But by our silence we send the message that modesty is a female issue and lust is a male issue. Guys sit around the pool wearing low-rise trunks and tanning their abs and pecs while wishing the girls would cover up. And girls are left wondering what people will think if they admit to struggling with lust.

Here’s the conclusion: If girls should be modest, so should guys. If girls should ask their fathers and brothers for input, guys should ask their mothers and sisters. If girls should consider their brothers in Christ, guys should consider their sisters in Christ.

When we apply modesty standards across the board it does two things:

First, it transforms modesty from something women do for men into something people do for others. This is far healthier.

Second, it puts men on the receiving end of the modesty conversation.

Brent Harris says that he’s learned a lot from his Modesty Survey. He’s learned that these discussions can be dangerous. For one thing, talking about modesty and lust in the same article can imply that immodesty causes lust, which is a destructive lie. No man (or woman) was ever forced to lust by another person’s outfit. For another, allowing men or women to give feedback to the opposite sex makes it look like our modesty is for each other. It’s not. It’s for God. Input from the opposite sex just helps.

The goal of modesty is to honor God with our bodies, not because they are dirty or shameful, but because they are glorious and holy. To paraphrase Jessica Rey, modesty is not about covering up what’s bad, but about revealing dignity.

No matter the season, both men and women should stop and think about what they put on or take off. Both men and women should ask themselves if their wardrobes reflect good taste, respect for their bodies, and humility of heart. Both men and women should remember that they were bought with a price, that they are set apart as God’s children, and must honor Him with their bodies.

Harris, Brent: Citing Sources: […]: [June 22, 2013]